We humans are a very creative species. We’re also very social. Put those characteristics together, throw in a little nice summer weather, and we are sure to come up with some pretty bizarre ways to celebrate.
While trolling for information (i.e. wasting time) during our long rainy spell, I came across a list of some of the craziest, most outrageous festivals held in all 50 states. Yes, it seems that East or West, North or South, Red or Blue, no state is immune from creating festivals that celebrate the ridiculous.
Since many of these festivals have already occurred, you might want to mark your calendar for next year. If you happen to travel to Texas next July, be sure to check out The Great Mosquito Festival. They like to grow things big in Texas, but I bet our Maine mosquitoes would measure up just fine.
Other July events include the Roswell UFO Festival, in New Mexico don’t forget to pack your tin foil hat. If you’re heading south, you might want to attend the underwater Music Festival in the Florida Keys. Unless they are flooded due to sea level rise, sea-themed music like Yellow Submarine and whale songs are piped underwater for the enjoyment of an audience of aquatic-costumed music aficionados (aka nut jobs).
On your way to Florida, you can follow the macabre Doll’s Head Trail, just outside Atlanta, which is made up of discarded doll parts. Why? Your guess is as good as mine.
The Midwest, known for its no-nonsense people, is also home to some crazy festivals. In Kansas, for some strange reason, they celebrate with a medieval jousting festival, and in Iowa, for over 100 years, they have crafted a 600-pound sculpture of a cow made entirely out of butter. Don’t go on a really hot day.
In Oklahoma, they are fond of team noodling. Ok, get your mind out of the gutter. This is not an activity for the amorous or for the faint of heart. At the Okie Noodling Festival, competitors vie to catch the largest catfish, using only their bare hands. The record noodled catfish weighed over 87 pounds.
In rough and tumble Virginia City, Montana, they like to dress in their finest period attire and waltz the evening away. May I have this dance?
Nebraska hosts the Chicken Show featuring chicken dance-offs, lots of chicken costumes, and a lot of fried chicken, leaving one to wonder what comes first, the chicken or the costume?
If you are looking for serious craziness, head to the week-long Nevada Burning Man festival in the Black Rock Desert. Since this is a community newspaper, the shenanigans will not be described more than to say it is not kid-friendly.
It seems that Ohioans are in love with duct tape which is celebrated at the Avon Heritage Duck Tape Festival, including a duck tape fashion show, floats and works of art all created with duck tape artistry. Boy, howdy, that sounds like fun.
Maine is also prone to some craziness now and then. Since so much of our year is NOT summer, we have our assorted Polar Bear swims in the dead of winter, the epitome of idiocy with a little death-wish thrown in for good measure, but always for a good cause. Also in the death-wish category is the annual Kenduskeag 10 mile canoe race, including frigid white-water, where the motto is “If you can’t be fast, be funny.” There are floating lobster trap foot races in Rockland and of course the infamous Damariscotta Pumpkinfest & Regatta, where boats, grown in backyard gardens in the form of thousand-pound pumpkins, are carved, decorated and paddled by costumed captains. Craziness and some fun, ayuh.
If you or your family have any unique celebrations, please feel free to share them. Send a photo and a short caption to ckck5@icloud.com and we will share them in an upcoming issue or on the GT Facebook Page.