On March 11, I was standing in our upstairs hallway talking to my daughter, Kate, about what to pack for our trip to New York City for the high school National Championship track meet. We were leaving in the morning and I just kept wishing I could press fast forward so that we could get in the car and on our way before the meet officials changed their minds and canceled the meet. After all it’s my daughter’s senior year and that would be unthinkable.
Just as we said the words, “I am so glad they haven’t canceled,” an alert came across my phone. The NBA had canceled its season due to the Coronavirus. We quickly checked the Nationals’ website; still on, and we both breathed a sigh of relief. I said, “no way they’ll cancel now, its too late. I am sure there are athletes already there.” We nodded in agreement and our family went to bed that night with the expectation that we’d get up and head to NYC in the morning.
I woke up at 1:30 a.m., and for some reason, I decided to check my phone. There it was. The headline I dreaded. “New Balance Nationals Cancels Meet.”
I did not sleep the rest of the night. All I could think about was how to tell Kate when she woke up. Besides, what did this really mean? How bad is this? What would become of her senior year? Were the rumors true; were they really thinking of canceling spring sports? How could this be happening? We spent the next four days in somewhat of a fog just trying to support each other and re-group.
I woke up that Monday morning to realize that my company was asking me to put together a mental health strategy that we can use both for our own employees and the employers we work with to address the Coronavirus. As I read the request, I snapped out of my fog and realized that our mental health crisis was at risk of getting significantly worse not only in our country but in our own schools and communities and we had to get ahead of it.
The National Institute of Health reports that one in five of us will experience a mental health condition in any given year. The uncertainty attached to this crisis, the social distancing, and isolation puts us at risk of an increase in the number of us who will experience a mental health condition. We are already seeing a significant increase in anxiety diagnoses in China with 42.6% of those who were in isolation being diagnosed.
I tell you this, Gorham, because this is hard. What you are feeling is normal but if left unchecked we are at risk of more significant mental health consequences. There are important steps we can take to remain self-aware. In addition, if we engage in self-care efforts now, we will have a better chance to stay mentally healthy during and in the aftermath of these difficult circumstances.
The American Psychological Association has listed the following as mental health risks of isolation and quarantine as well as some self-care techniques to mitigate these risks. There are normal emotional responses to social distancing, isolation and quarantine that can be mitigated if we remain self-aware:
Fear and anxiety – The natural byproduct of this uncertainty is fear and anxiety. It is normal to be worried about what will happen next and/or about the idea of family members contracting the COVID-19. Some people may have trouble sleeping. It is also normal to feel nervous about supplies such as food and medication.
Boredom, loneliness, and sadness – A hiatus from normal activity such as school, work or social activities can cause low mood or depression.
Anger, frustration, or irritability – Loss of control can lead to anger with those imposing restrictions. You may also feel frustrated or angry at those who may have contracted the virus or put others at risk.
Stigma – If you are exposed or sick you may feel stigma given public fears that others may contract the virus from you. This can feel even more isolating and lead to depression.
The following coping suggestions may help:
Create and follow a daily routine – Preserving a daily routine can help both adults and children feel a sense of structure and normalcy. Control what you can control during this time. Get up at a certain time, get ready for your day, and incorporate productive activities such as learning, exercising, and other healthy hobbies as needed.
Limit news consumption to reliable sources and balance with other activities – Spend a significant amount of time each day away from the news cycle and engage in other activities such as reading, listening to music, or meditation.
Stay virtually connected to people – Emotional connection is vital during this time. Remain connected to loved ones through text, phone calls, video chat and social media. If you are feeling anxious confide in someone you trust. Connect with those who are in a similar situation to yourself.
Maintain a healthy lifestyle – Get enough sleep, eat healthy, exercise in your home, go for walks and get some fresh air. If needed, consider telehealth psychological therapy. Many of the therapists in Gorham are engaging in video therapy. Also, if applicable you can consult your human resource team at work about an Employee Assistance Program (EAP). Workplace EAPs will be able to offer a set number of mental health therapy sessions.
Stress and mental health management – Did you know that exhaling longer than you inhale positively impacts the anxiety center of your brain? Try breathing exercises. Breathe in four seconds, hold four seconds, and exhale for as long as you can. Do this four times for one cycle and do it at least once per day or as much as needed. There are also meditation and stress management apps you can download on your phone.
One particularly powerful tool is a gratitude journal. Challenge yourself. For the next two weeks, list four things you are grateful for, no repeats. By the end of the two weeks you will likely start to notice that your thought process has shifted, and you will see the positive more readily than the negative.
Let’s also keep in mind that there are particularly vulnerable populations to whom we should remain sensitive and supportive. Specifically:
Older adults may feel more scared and vulnerable at this time – be sure to offer support and care as is reasonable. Those with existing mental health conditions may experience an exacerbation of anxiety and/or depression.
Those in recovery from substance use disorder – social distancing can make getting the support needed in recovery difficult. There are online resources that can be accessed for meetings and support.
Healthcare and other front-line workers may also feel a significant level of stress during this time. In addition, once the crisis is over, there is risk that in the absence of the chaos, depression and anxiety can develop. Be supportive, and if you can, find a way thank them for all they are doing for us in this crisis.
As my family and I have settled into this new world we have tried to remain optimistic. We even bought Kate a prom dress and have decided that if we need to, we will “DIY” this senior year. We have tried to maintain our regular work outs, remote work, and school schedules as well as maintained our normal family dinners and evening time routine. I can’t say its perfect and that we don’t feel stress and sadness at times, but it has helped. Above all, we have tried to keep our sense of humor.
So, in this difficult time I offer some awareness and suggestions but do what works for you and remember, the most important thing we can do for our kids and our families is take care of ourselves. If we don’t do the basics to ensure we remain mentally healthy we will not be capable of caring for those around us.
We can get through this Gorham. Together. One day at a time. It may be virtually for awhile but stay connected, support each other, try to stay optimistic, get outside, and try to remain grateful for what we still have in front of us.
For more resources, visit the following websites:
Keeping your distance to stay safe, from the American Psychological Association
Coronavirus information for the NAMI community, from the National Alliance on Mental Illness
Taking care of your mental health in the face of uncertainty, from the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention
Digital solution for substance use disorder, from WEconnect
Editor’s Note: Kristin Tugman will continue to develop and build out mental health coping strategies throughout the life of the crisis. For more tips and tools, follow her for free on Twitter @DrTugmanPhD