Prior to Covid-19 and the events sparked by George Floyd’s death, mental health issues were already on the rise for individuals of all ages. But in the wake of these significant traumas, losses, and unpredictable changes, finding new ways to support our mental health and wellbeing is more important than ever.
Whether you are unexpectedly working from home, being asked to return to work, preparing to homeschool your kids, caring for an elder, are sick with COVID-19, managing job loss and financial insecurity, or experiencing other major life changes, it is likely we are all feeling similar emotions: insecurity, stress, sadness, anxiety, and fear.
The good news is that while we may not have control over many of these external factors, we do have control over how we respond to them. Based on years of research, we know that mental wellness can be enhanced through the resilience of the individual. Resilience is a learned skill that shifts our perspective so we can respond to life events with the awareness, mindset, compassion, strength and optimism to not only ‘bounce back,’ but to also grow from it and be positively transformed by it.
Living a more resilient life does not just happen on its own. It takes work. Just as we work out to strengthen our physical muscles to stay healthy and become stronger, it is essential to work on building our resilience muscles as well. Resilience is often viewed as a quality we either have or do not have, but it can be learned and developed like any other skill.
Here are some of the scientifically proven strategies that can help you face this difficult time and help you find a more resilient path through it:
Increase Your Mind/Body Awareness
Developed by mindfulness teacher and leadership coach Pamela Weiss, the “3 Center Check-In” is an easy way to improve your relationship with your mind, feelings, and body. Take a brief pause throughout your day, beginning with a few deep breaths and then ask yourself the following Head/Heart/Body questions. Head: What am I thinking in my mind? Heart: What am I feeling in my heart? Body: What am I sensing or aware of in my body?
Use An Optimistic Thinking Style
Optimism is not about positive words or images, but it’s about how you think (your beliefs). And the foundation of thinking with optimism is how your thoughts and beliefs explain why the good and the bad things are happening. This is important because research suggests the more optimistic you are the less likely you are to suffer from depression and anxiety and the more likely you are to adapt better to negative events.
The basis of using an optimistic thinking style, to be more resilient when facing difficult events, is to exaggerate the good and minimize the bad. The next time you start to feel stress in your body, or notice negative thoughts and beliefs, stop and explain this event to yourself using OPTimism, or O-P-T:
O: OTHER CAUSES. Rather than thinking the problem is being done to you because you are stupid or incompetent, consider all causes, including potential external causes. P: PARTICULAR. This particular problem, failure, or disappoint is an isolated event and does not impact every area of your life. T: TEMPORARY. Optimistic thinking means you view adversity as a temporary event, a momentary setback that you will recover from.
Take a Strength-Based Approach to Each Day
Character strengths are the positive parts of your personality that impact how you think, feel and behave. These strengths are the core of your true character. They make you unique and are said to be the keys to being your best self. Research supports, when we know and use these strengths on a regular basis, we have better achievement, satisfaction, and wellbeing. A free VIA Survey of Character Strengths is available here. You may have to register at the site in order to take the survey.
Once you’ve identified your character strengths, trying to use them in a new way has been shown to increase happiness and decrease depression for up to six months. One study found a relationship between using signature strengths the previous day and a positive mood the following day. Pick one of your top strengths and use it in a new way each day for a week. For example, if your top strengths is humor, learn a new joke each day for a week. Or, if one of your top strengths is love of learning, you can commit to learning and using a new vocabulary word each day.
These are difficult times. We are all experiencing moments, days, and weeks where we truly struggle. But we can use these strategies to help lessen our suffering and recover more quickly. Remember to check-in with your mind/heart/body regularly, remind yourself that this is a temporary moment that we will all get through together. Remember you have an abundant number of strengths within you that you can lean on to help you thrive through each day.
Dr. Miremadi-Baldino has dedicated her education, research and career to helping individuals, schools and organizations foster resilience and lead more positive purposeful lives.